Books

Once Upon A Time...

There was a little girl whose beauty radiated with love for everything around her. She burned with a passion to learn, to experience everything, and to embrace it to its fullest and most infinite capacity. She craved life. She was special. She was important. She was connected. She was meant for something big. And she knew it. She was Chosen... for Love.

And Then... She Grew Up.

 In CHOSEN, I have woven a collection of poems I wrote during my 8-year journey back to Love with narrative to encourage and empower other young women who feel confused, angry, and abandoned by Love, and who are trying desperately to find what their soul craves.

We lose Love. We lose Meaning.

We spend our whole lives trying to find Love again—in relationships, in dreams, in people, in goals, in experiences. We all get glimpses of it, and some of us get lost along the way, forgetting that the relationship, the dream, the experience, is just a taste of Love...not the whole thing. Yet, as we make our way back, we discover that while we were making choices for us, so was Love.

Sweet Visitor,

 

 

For those of you who know me, it is easy to understand the compilation of this poetry. For those of you who landed on this page by some other divine orchestration, allow me to elaborate on the journey that led me here and the same journey that will lead me forward.

My name is Alyssa Noelle Coelho. I am a 25 year-old dancer and traveler with a degree in Sociocultural Anthropology from the University of California, San Diego. I own a design, media and communication company called Lionheart Creations in Southern California. I was first published in May 2016 and then self-published CHOSEN, a compilation of my poetry, in the late summer of 2016. I love to dance, travel, adventure, explore, design, paint, decorate, design, and most of all, enjoy time with my family. I am finally in a position where I can really say, "I am me. And I am happy."

But, it wasn't always this way.

I had grown up in a very flexible Christian home where I was taught about this Light, this Love. Being young, I was unable to fully comprehend the meaning behind this so-called Light, but boy, did I know and feel its Love. As a child, I felt invincible. By fifth grade, I was ready to move out and apply to college and trust me, I tried - my dad can attest to the phone call he received from the University of Hawaii. I was just so determined to live, to learn, to experience. Somehow, feeling the full support and guidance of that Love made me feel like I was here on a mission.

That is, until I grew up.

Like most young girls, my junior high and high school years were...well to be honest, hell. I got to junior high and was struck very harshly with my new reality. So I tried...I attempted the whole fitting in thing - does that ever really work? I also tried the standing out thing - again, up in flames. It seemed as if no matter what I did, I could not feel okay. I could not feel safe. I could not feel me. I could not feel Love. My connection dulled and I gradually strayed from those feelings of importance and determination. I began to wonder why - why I was here, why I was me.

I had lost my Love and I had lost my meaning.

So then I did what we all do...Without realizing it at the time, I searched for Love everywhere. I searched for Love in dance, in books, in drugs, in martial arts, in church and of course, in boys. To no surprise, each of these outlets did not fulfill the Love I was searching for. And each time I tried so desperately to squeeze, poke, and prod, it simply did not fill the whole cup. No matter how graceful the pirouette, no matter how thrilling the novel, no matter how intense the drug, no matter how precise the combination, no matter how strong-willed the pastor - I simply could not f
ind all of Love. As you can imagine, each of these ventures resulted in some bruises and scars, some dislocated joints and some irrecoverable lost innocence.

I had never dreamed of writing a book or of publishing a compilation. Along the journey, writing simply became a means of formulating what I was feeling and getting it out of my body and onto paper before I self-destructed. Most of the time, it worked and after high school ended, I found myself not picking up the pen so much. I had entered college and was finally around others who were also striving to succeed academically, who were eager to learn, and who were genuinely kind and caring. I was finally experiencing life outside those metal gates that seemed to wrap more around my soul than that school.

Yet, in 2015, my world began to crumble again. I was in the midst of witnessing my dad's health decline rapidly, my sister loosing her unborn child, and my pastors and mentors being exposed for their hypocrisy. I was also taking a couple religion courses that were threatening the foundation of everything I knew, an astronomy class that was blowing my mind from an entirely different angle, and a psychology statistics course that was teaching me how little humankind actually knows and can actually know. On top of all of that, I found myself completely unable to connect anymore - again. My old modalities of facilitating connection were simply failing. My faith was collapsing and for some reason, I was drawn back to my poetry - the words that I had vomited on the pages of several different journals in dark corners to save myself from myself so many years ago.

As I reviewed and relived that 8-year journey with a heavy heart and soaked pillow, I noticed the cycle. I remembered how connected I had felt when I was younger, how invincible I knew I was in that Love. Then, I realized that after I lost sight of Him, every wrong turn, every bump in the road, and every head-on collision was my journey of trying to find Him again. That 8-year journey is the most vivid demonstration of the cycle we participate in, trying to find Love again through all His many vessels.

My hope is that these words, poetry and narrative, will help young teens and adults understand that no matter how dark the hole or how deep the wound, they are not alone. We are all here, on the same terribly horrific and utterly beautiful journey - searching for the same relentless and unconditional Love. And I would love, absolutely love, to listen to yours. 

Sharing The Love


"Alyssa's poetry speaks openly, with honesty and vulnerability. Her directness, particularly in "Arise," "Keepsake," "Empty Spaces & Far Off Places," and "Unshackled," invites readers in. This revelatory poetry of self-discovery opens to readers a woman's soul, but helps readers to see themselves as well, and in Alyssa's poetry, readers will find encouragement. These poems testify to the strength of love and the consequent importance of never giving up."

 - Katie Montagna,

Professor of English and Humanities

“Love. Love. Love. Everyone wants it and needs it, but it's hard to find.  How totally refreshing to read Alyssa Noelle Coelho's Chosen, which tells the captivating story-- in a series of spoken word poems-- of Coelho's own journey towards finding ever-elusive love. At times surprising and unpredictable, but always tender-hearted and closely observed, her hopeful journey offers lessons for us all!”

- Carlton Smith

Author of Hippie Homeschooling

“Every once in a while, Love surprises you by sending a powerful voice to remind of its Presence. Alyssa is that Chosen voice. Dynamic, passionate, purposeful. I have been utterly and profoundly moved by her poetry and its insistent reminder that Love is within reach, that Love is always there and always has been. Her beautiful often intimate, vulnerable and sometimes raw writing resonates deeply and gives one the courage to step out and claim the love and belonging every human seeks. In our busy, frantic lives we forget the simple truth. Love is always there... It has never left. This unforgettable journey back to love will kindle many on their own unique quests to embrace the love they desire. This book is a must read - it will challenge, provoke and change you. And if you haven't seen Alyssa perform her poetry live, you owe it to yourself see her show asap.”

- Yvonne Whitelaw, MD, MPH Physician Coach, Facilitator & Advocate

Founder of Thriving Ideals and Thriving Physicians Coaching & Consulting

“Raw, emotional, and visceral, Alyssa showcases the journey of a girl evolving to womanhood and the central force guiding all of us: Love. Her vulnerability and prose framing provide a unique combination that ultimately helps us understand that we are not alone in our search.”

- Jen Jonson

Prose/Poetry Writer

"The depth of Alyssa's sincerity is evident on every page. Her desire to return to love is palpable, causing the reader to reach out (and reach within) with compassion. I applaud her willingness to be vulnerable and encourage us all to love more deeply."

 - Nikki Elliott,

Author of The Intuitive Mother

"As someone who has coached many authors through the vulnerable process of sharing their stories, I love seeing a talented young woman, writer, poet, artist step onto the scene, into her power, and closer to Love. Alyssa's journey is raw, inspiring, and beautifully written. I have no doubts that Love will use Alyssa's many gifts, her willingness to bare her soul, and her carefully crafted art to wrap Its arms around every young woman who cracks open this masterpiece."

 - Amanda Johnson,

Founder, True to Intention + Message, Brand, and Story Coach

"By the half-way point, my jaw was on the floor. Alyssa Noelle is so talented. This is a must read for any and all women.  You see yourself, your sisters, your friends, someone in each of these expressions. Poems sound too small a word/description.  I am moved beyond words, I feel the emotions, all of them, like they are my own, like I’m reading my own diary just written with much better expression. She is to be praised for her honesty and her courage, but more importantly she is to be heard by any all. WOW……"

 - LaVonne Shields,

CEO, MCA Accounting Strong

“Alyssa Noelle Coelho has arrived. Her brilliantly crafted, rockstar poetry will awaken, inspire, and begin to unshackle those who have lost sight of themselves and their Love. Profound, unique, and utterly vulnerable, CHOSEN depicts the reality of our journey back to real, raw, and true love.”

 - Ryan Leonhardi,

M. ED. Educational Leader, English Teacher, Poet