Renewal of the Mind

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” – Romans 12:2

The renewing of your mind…
I reconnected with an old friend this week and as we caught up over a timeline of lost years, I found myself fixed on one particular year – my first year of college. No, it wasn’t because I moved out and was on my own for the first time. No, it wasn’t because I got caught up in a ton of partying. & No, it was definitely not because I hated school.
Quite the contrary. In fact, I loved college. I was finally learning what I wanted to learn, how I wanted to learn, and when I wanted to learn it!
My choice.
My subjects.
My schedule.
My time.
Finally.
Little did I know, my world was about to turn upside down. Learning HOW to be a real, true student was the all consuming lesson. The very thing I desired, the very thing I loved, the very thing I sought was going to flip my heart inside out & continue to mind$&@% me for the rest of my years as a student & probably long after.
KNOWLEDGE.
What is the truth? How is the truth found? What creates the truth? How is the truth manipulated? & then the question that brought all the other questions to a shrieking halt… What if there is no such thing as truth?
It only took weeks of soaking my pillow at night, months of grueling morning meditations, and endless moments of hushing my anxiety to remind myself… It was okay to not have an ANSWER, a truth. That maybe, there isn’t an answer. Maybe, there never really was an answer. Perhaps, the concept of an “answer” is really just one ginormous illusion.
Learn & Grow.
Wonder & Change.
Renew & Transform.
And in all this chaos, seek Love. Because I promise you that the moment you stop trying to find “the answer, the truth” – will be the moment you are one step closer to finding Love.

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